MADISON, Wis. -- Three men who dug up a young woman's corpse to have sex with it after seeing her obituary photo cannot be charged with attempted sexual assault because Wisconsin has no law against necrophilia, an appeals court ruled Thursday.

A judge was correct to dismiss the charges against twin brothers Nicholas and Alexander Grunke and Dustin Radke, all 21, because lawmakers never intended to criminalize sex with a corpse, the District 4 Court of Appeals said in a 3-0 ruling.

Levi's has created a new ad for 501 jeans with both straight and gay versions. The straight version, in which a man pulls up his jeans and causes the street below, along with an attractive woman, to crash through the floor of his apartment, is appearing on major networks. The gay version, exactly the same except that the woman is replaced by a man, is running on LOGO.

In both ads, the main actor runs away with his new romantic interest.

Liza Minnelli is a familiar sight shopping in the East 60s, but someone at the neighborhood Gap could use a refresher course in recognizing local legends.

A Gatecrasher pal reports this recent sighting of her at the E. 66th and Third Ave. store, where she was being helped by a sales assistant.

"The employee asked her, 'Has anyone ever told you you look like Judy Garland?'" says the snitch. "She coldly answered, 'No!'"

You'd leave it alone after that, right?

"The confused employee went on to say, 'Oh my God! You're her! You are Judy Garland!'"

Oh. No. She. Didn't.

A well-built man was forced to take a drugs test in Stockholm recently after a police officer assumed that muscles like his could only have been developed with the help of illegal substances.

The female assistant police officer got into a conversation with Tomislav Boduljak and his friend late at night in central Stockholm.

According to Boduljak, 27, the police officer was pleasant at first, but changed her attitude when he said he worked out. Saying his muscles were 'abnormal', she said he must have used drugs.

"I asked if she didn't think it possible that I work out a lot and eat well. She said that if someone looks like me, she assumes they have taken drugs," he told Metro.

He has been known to intercept sweaters at Christmas (though I do the same thing at times -- battles over chenille sweaters can be quite fierce, if brief).

New Levi's 501 Jeans Commercial Goes Both Ways

It's appropriate that a gay character would be hawking Special K, a breakfast cereal that shares its name with a recreational drug. At least I think he's gay; that, or he's really in touch with his feminine side for a straight guy.

There are two versions of the ad. In one, what I can only assume is a gay admin and his BFF, prance in on their prettier co-worker who is eating Special K and having an orgasm. The pair grill the skinny bitch about her figure.

"Who is he?" the gay admin teases. In real life he would have been like, "Vomiting? Diet Pills?"

My first impulse was to hate the ads. Why do they always have to rely on stereotypes to illustrate a person is gay? Like the Secret deodorant ad with the bitchy gay boss; his smarmy assistant gets him the right material and he practically tears her a new hole. Again, I'm only assuming the boss is gay, but if he's straight, then he's a pair of earrings away from becoming a drag queen.

Then I thought about it. How else do you imply a person is gay without resorting to stereotypes?

That these ads aren't preceded by a parental warning is progress in and of itself, but when it's two straight guys asking the homo which hot guy inspired his switch to Special K, then I'll know we've arrived.

It's appropriate that a gay character would be hawking Special K, a breakfast cereal that shares its name with a recreational drug.

"Holy crap," I said to my BFF, "I'm the homo from the Special K commercial!"

"I thought so too," she said, "but I was afraid to say anything."

The truth hurts but sometimes it's painfully funny.