Many of the partners of those who died in 9/11 became a kind of hero themselves, forced to fight their second-class status in America in the public arena. Because their relationships are not legally recognized by the federal government, they are not eligible to receive social security benefits. In order to receive any benefits from the numerous 9/11 compensation funds and charities—some of them had to fight unending battles in court just to claim what straight, married partners only had to ask for. Some have suceeded in winning partial battles, some have given up.

But it isn't about the money. Yes, many surviving partners found themselves in financial crisis when their loved ones died—but the emotional aftermath was far more damaging. Gay partners of 9/11 victims were generally left out in the cold—unacknowledged and treated, sometimes, like they didn't even exist. One survivor, John Keohane, so devestated by the loss of his partner of 17 years Mike Lyons on 9/11, committed suicide. Perhaps, if he had received the same support & counseling being lavished on the straight partners of 9/11 victims, he might still be here.

Francis S. Coppola, a New York City detective whose partner, a firefighter named Eddie, perhaps summed up the experience of gay survivors best in an interview with Gay.com: "I have never been more proud of being an American or a New Yorker, but at the same time it has made me sad. The greatest country in the world, and yet we are treated like second-class citizens... The great love of my life died doing what he did best and what he loved to do: helping others. I have never been an activist or ever wanted to be one; however, it is time we stand up and be counted and demand equality—nothing more or nothing less."